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Friday, September 30, 2016
Monday, September 26, 2016
10 Things Adoptees Want You to Know
Number 5
We're halfway through.
Don't tell us to be grateful to our parents.
Since when has wanting to know one's history and where one came from become a hindrance affecting gratefulness?
Are all genealogists adoptees? No. So why can they seek out their roots of past generations but when we do it, it's interpreted as being ungrateful?
We are grateful, in fact many times, very grateful but we also have and want the right to know who we really are, where we really came from. Our roots. Our heritage.
Here's something to think about - our DNA know it all - but we don't. Nice thought! So what's so harmful if we knew?
Thoughts on this please.
We're halfway through.
Don't tell us to be grateful to our parents.
Since when has wanting to know one's history and where one came from become a hindrance affecting gratefulness?
Are all genealogists adoptees? No. So why can they seek out their roots of past generations but when we do it, it's interpreted as being ungrateful?
We are grateful, in fact many times, very grateful but we also have and want the right to know who we really are, where we really came from. Our roots. Our heritage.
Here's something to think about - our DNA know it all - but we don't. Nice thought! So what's so harmful if we knew?
Thoughts on this please.
Monday, September 19, 2016
10 Things Adoptees Want You to Know
Number 4
Don't give false information on our medical records.
First, this can be a dangerous practice, especially in an emergency situation.
Second, it is a great effort and time demanding task to clear one's record of false information, convincing the source we're telling the truth and have it all replaced with a big I DON'T KNOW.
How was your medical records handled as you were growing up? Did your adoptive family provide info that attained to their family or did they admit not knowing? Leave a comment below.
Don't give false information on our medical records.
First, this can be a dangerous practice, especially in an emergency situation.
Second, it is a great effort and time demanding task to clear one's record of false information, convincing the source we're telling the truth and have it all replaced with a big I DON'T KNOW.
How was your medical records handled as you were growing up? Did your adoptive family provide info that attained to their family or did they admit not knowing? Leave a comment below.
Monday, September 12, 2016
10 Things Adoptees Want You to Know
Number 3
Not all grass is greener on the other side.
Our biological side might not have been ideal for raising a child but not all adoptive sides are ideal either. I was lucky as many others are. I had wonderful adoptive parents. My birth mother's life wasn't easy. But look at the cases reported of abuse by adoptive parents or murder by adopted children. Situations happen and it's not because we're adoptees. Genetic mental issues can lead an 'adoptee' to murder, but can anyone say that the same person with the same predisposition would not have done the same had he been raised by his biological family? I don't think so, unless you can claim to be some kind of prophet.
What are your thoughts on this? Leave a comment below.
Not all grass is greener on the other side.
Our biological side might not have been ideal for raising a child but not all adoptive sides are ideal either. I was lucky as many others are. I had wonderful adoptive parents. My birth mother's life wasn't easy. But look at the cases reported of abuse by adoptive parents or murder by adopted children. Situations happen and it's not because we're adoptees. Genetic mental issues can lead an 'adoptee' to murder, but can anyone say that the same person with the same predisposition would not have done the same had he been raised by his biological family? I don't think so, unless you can claim to be some kind of prophet.
What are your thoughts on this? Leave a comment below.
Monday, September 05, 2016
10 Things Adoptees Want You to Know
Back with the next one in our series.
2. Since adoption is no secret and when the adopted child grows up he or she will learn about the birds and the bees anyway, don't tell us, as children, that we were brought by the stork, or found in a cabbage patch, or even that we smiled at you so you knew we were yours.
As an adoptee and as a mother of three biological children I will say this once and only once - all babies smile, and they'll smile at any face they see. Our smile did not pick you, and in most cases you either chose us before ever seeing our smile or you met us when we were given to you to raise.
Were you told you were adopted? If yes, what was the story told to you? If no, how did you feel about that when you found out? Please comment below.
2. Since adoption is no secret and when the adopted child grows up he or she will learn about the birds and the bees anyway, don't tell us, as children, that we were brought by the stork, or found in a cabbage patch, or even that we smiled at you so you knew we were yours.
As an adoptee and as a mother of three biological children I will say this once and only once - all babies smile, and they'll smile at any face they see. Our smile did not pick you, and in most cases you either chose us before ever seeing our smile or you met us when we were given to you to raise.
Were you told you were adopted? If yes, what was the story told to you? If no, how did you feel about that when you found out? Please comment below.
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